Reflections of a Rockstar - KingCobraJFS

Hello YouTube. I got my hair in a ponytail cuz it's it's a bit stuffy outside. Yeah. And I could turn on my AC if I wanted, but I don't want to like make the electric bill too expensive if I can help it. But I appreciate you all watching Cobra Live. Oh, Cobra turned off comments so you can't comment stupid [ __ ] Oh, you poor baby. Better not go live, Cobra. It's like, yeah, no one's forcing you to [ __ ] watch. Be sure to check out Tactical Soap. It uh it gets the ladies horny. So, if you're looking to uh increase your chances of getting laid, you're going to the club, going to the bar, and you have a casual handsoff approach and just be yourself and respect women regardless if you get laid or not, and you rock some tactical soap and you might get some results. Looks are not everything. It's only half of it. The other half is personality. If you can find someone that gets you off and they're easy on the eyes and they're easy to talk to, you know, you'll have a solid relationship. Pull me a redneck screwdriver which consists of that Fleshman's or not Fleshman's Nicolai whatever cheap vodka and some voltage. Oh, Cobra's live. And you know what really irritates me about this is that I can't go live without my haters being like, "You only go live because you're counting the negative." And then they proceed to harass me nonstop in the comment section. So then if I go live, turn off the comments and then I don't give a [ __ ] if people give me money, which it's appreciated if you do, but it's not a requirement. I see a lot of YouTubers who just sit there and they beg for money. And I'm like, I I'm over here like, "Hey, if you want to give me a couple bucks, that's cool. If not, that's cool, too." You know, and if you don't like Cobra's videos, here's a magical thought. Don't watch. If I still have a [ __ ] ton of vodka left, I'll just save some for tomorrow. It's not that big of a deal. Yeah, I made a song about Tactical Soap. It's called Dark Shadows of Seduction. And tactical soap does work, but if you're a piece of [ __ ] then the soap's only going to get you so far. What gives Cobra the right to understand women? It's like, well, when you stop thinking with your dick and start thinking with your ears and you listen to the crap women [ __ ] about, all of a sudden, you start to understand how women think. I first I first heard of Tactical Soap from George Bruno, the Sultan of Silver. And I don't care if George Bruno's Christian. We're both pipe smokers. We're both dudes and that's enough. You know, I actually got to smoke a pipe with him on panel once and that was just one of the coolest things ever. Well, we got King Cobra on. How are you, sir? Doing good, man. I've been a huge fan for years. You enter possible. Good to see you. Thanks for join Thanks for having me, man. Thank you for joining us tonight. Absolutely. Where are you from? Casper, Wyoming. Oh, wow. Wyoming. Nice. Yes, sir. What did you do all day today? Uh, I watched YouTube videos. I make wands for a living. It's a magic wand. Oh, Cobra Craft Me Wands on Etsy. What do people do with that? they practice magic or they're a fan of my videos that I do on my channel or maybe they're Harry Potter fans. He's like, "What did you do today?" And I was like, "I make magic wands." And by turning off the comments, I can just focus on doing the video. You want to watch, cool. You don't want to watch, that's cool, too. I did make a tribute song to my lizard puff. It will be on my new album. I'm not sure what I'm gonna call my new album yet. I'm just putting putting together a bunch of songs. And then once I got that figured out, I'll figure out an album cover and a name for it. You know, all the Sunno remakes and Sununo songs and what have you will be free. And then like anything that I've come up with kind of thing, you know. Let me let me make this perfectly clear. I go live when I want to. It has nothing to do with the benefits or the [ __ ] that I put up with. It tastes like McDonald's chicken strips and vodka. Oh, this is this is lovely. I like Nicolai vodka because it's cheap. And look at the cap. It's goth. Look at that. That big old black cap. You know what's up. And vodka is definitely associated with like Russians and not trying to be a racist or anything, you know. Ultra Fiesta Mango and Ultra Peachy Keen. Like peach and mango flavored monster. Yeah. Let's just pour that in there. At least when I copy Azie Osborne and Danny Phil, it's done out of flattery and admiration. But when like bite-sized Cobra rips off my videos, it's done just to [ __ ] with me because you can't come up with your own original thing. Hey Cobra, how's the me doing? You haven't made me since Halloween of last year. How's it doing? It's doing just fine. I'm watching it like a hawk and based off of my experiences with making it and when I get successful results and I produce alcohol, it's doing the exact thing that it did last like three to four times I did when I made apple silk. So there you go. Apple silk me on point, son. So, it may not be ready till the 18th of July, you know, and that's just fine. And, you know, I enjoy making my own homemade wine. I think it's a treat to taste my results and be like, "Okay, if it gets me drunk, well then cool. I've discovered something cool." It's like, you haven't discovered [ __ ] All you do is discover how to make jail house wine. You [ __ ] You better not take a rip of that boy. Cough to get off. [ __ ] [ __ ] It's what it is. My biggest problem with making the uh apple silk, which just like making meat in general when I use turbo yeast is I think, okay, I pour a small amount in there and it's not working. So then I poured a ton more and then it just foams up into the into the [ __ ] lock, you know? And I'm just like, it's definitely fermenting. I can see the foam right above the apple chunks. And I'm not by any means by any means I am not an expert at making wine. Just some fun little hobby I wanted to try. Like I I've always wanted to try making my own homemade alcohol. And then when I find a recipe that works, I just stick with it, you know? Excuse me. and just let it do its thing, you know. [ __ ] The thing about smoking a pipe is that I run the risk of losing my million dollar singing voice. How I'm able to see like Johnny Cash and Elvis Presley and the Backstreet Boys and the Beatles. And people are watching this on YouTube going, "Dude, holy [ __ ] Cobra's got the voice." Yeah. My tribute song for Puff. I lost my lizard Puff about four years ago to the day and it's been super hard. like I still love animals and the the thought of let's think of it YouTube when I lost my bearded dragon I was so [ __ ] depressed and on top of that animal control wouldn't help me look for him because they've been harassed by my YouTube trolls for owning owning him and when animal control came over and said, "Well, your lizard loves you. You're doing a great job. Keep doing your thing." I'm like, "All right, cool." They they they look and they go, "Wait a minute." And I explained to them that I'm a famous YouTuber who has Asberers and this is my therapy animal. and Puff bonded to me the second I hooked up and made him my pet. That's kind of my fault for spoiling Puff Rotten. I should have had a a a dragon bearded dragon leash for when I took him outside. I didn't get one because he never took off for me like that before. So, I figured, okay, you know, a pup's a wild animal. He's going to do what he wants to do. [ __ ] everybody else. You don't even know. This one time when I was hanging out with Puff, he was clawing out of his tank like, "Let me out, you asshole." And I was passing out. So, I took Puff out of his tank. I held him on my chest. I'm sitting there petting them and I'm like, "It's okay, Puff. It's okay, Puffers. It's okay." And then I passed out. Then when I woke up, Puff was sitting there sleeping on my chest with the blankets pulled over the both of us. It was honestly the sweetest thing, dude. If you're a bearded dragon, you get it. And then after a couple minutes, Puff woke up and I'm like, "Puff, you've been out of your tank for a hot minute, bud. I don't want you to get cold. My, you know, that's the thing of it. When when when my account was in the negative, if my account was in the negative and Puff needed food, I'm like, well, you know, I found a way to make it happen. If Puff's light bulb went out, I found a way to make it happen. I'm like, you know what? [ __ ] it. If my account's in the negative, I'll deal with the consequences, but my my lizard comes first. You know, I did everything to spoil that wizard. I did everything to spoil that lizard rotten and make sure he always had everything he needed. So, you know, when he ran away from me, it felt like a personal slap to the face, like kind of [ __ ] you. Thanks for spoiling me rotten. But then I realized that puff is a wild animal and that okay, animals are going to do what they do. And like, you know, I was so devastated after losing Puff. And it's not enough that I have to lose the coolest lizard ever. Everyone's going to give me [ __ ] about it. To be fair, I've never had a bearded dragon prior to Puff. Like, no one's born knowing how to own every wild and untamed beast and creature of said world. And people have been constantly messaging me and telling me, "Oh, Josh, just get another bearded dragon. Get a dog or get a cat or get a boa, you know, get a get a balltail python or whatever." And it's just like, I don't want another pet. Honestly, if my dad thought I was a burden to him, he wouldn't have bought me this sweet house. So, there's that. every time my [ __ ] fans give me [ __ ] about it. By fans, I mean sarcastic because my YouTube trolls are secretly my biggest fans. Like I swear to you, they're sitting there like It's like, "Well, where the [ __ ] your dad?" That's when I look at my YouTube trolls and I go, "You want to give me [ __ ] about losing puff? Where the [ __ ] your daddy at in your life?" And the trolls hate it. That makes Josh happy. Well, that makes us mad. So, my YouTube trolls would literally harass animal control about trying to get Puff taken away. And when it didn't work, it just made them that much matter. So, so then they try to get my King Cobra JFS channel taken down. And when that doesn't work, they go and get Walt's GoFundMe page that I set up taken down because my trolls are [ __ ] [ __ ] My trolls are more miserable than me losing puff and that's just the sad truth of it. You know, this [ __ ] goddamn video still going. Yes, it is. Yeah, we're still going. Yeah, we're still going. Everybody wanted to give me [ __ ] about smoking pot with puff. And it's like the second puff saw me loading marijuana into a pipe, he would hiss at me like I'm like, "Hey puff, you want to hit a weed?" And he'd sit there and go nuts. And I'm like, "Okay, I'll give you one little hit, but I'm going to open the cage in the tank so he doesn't choke you out. I'm like, "Okay, my bearded dragon love weed." And towards the end of Pup's life after being It's my first time owning a bearded dragon and metro and all that kind of thing. If I wanted to get puff marijuana, I would just take a little nug, break it up, and sprinkle it all over his romaine lettuce with a little bit of calcium powder. So like you can get the effects without like the smoke damaging you kind of thing, you know? And Puff didn't care. Like my my beardy loved marijuana and then like when a thunderstorm would pop out pop up outside I'd open the window and curtain wise and keep the glass closed and Puff would stare at the thunder and the lightning and go. And you see it in my cooking videos too. I still have Puff's tank. I'm not gonna get rid of that tank. Even if I never get a beated dragon. Even if I never buy another bearded dragon ever again, I'm still going to keep Puff's tank because that's how much I love that lizard. And the fact that people are still giving me [ __ ] about Puff four years later just shows you how [ __ ] miserable my trolls are. My trolls are more miserable than me losing Puff. And that's a sad fact. My YouTube trolls are so [ __ ] jealous and miserable of Cobra. It doesn't matter what I do in life. You can't control what happens. All you can do is control how you react to it. And that's what I've had to learn in the 34 years of my miserable [ __ ] existence of getting bullied by everyone and rejected by every chick I've liked since the fourth grade. It's just learning that life is what you make of it and you can't let the haters get to you. And that's the realest, dude. Nikolai Vodka. Nikolai cannot die. That's why I keep buying the brand because I like the black cap that comes on top of the Nikolai vodka. Super goth. And I'm a Call of Duty fan and Nikolai is my favorite character. or something. I'm like, "Yeah, I have shot the gun now. I need to shot the glass." I missed my lizard puff. And then when I asked Sudo to make a tribute song, they did it. And the tribute song was so beautiful. It was just like, dude, the first time I heard it, I started crying my [ __ ] eyes out. Dude, I love my lizard puff. And right up towards the end, he got a little cocky and it was like, I'm spoiled rotten. I can do whatever I want. [ __ ] Josh. You know, that's pretty much how it is. You know, wild animals are going to do what they do prior to Ian. Outside of that, I don't know what his last two owners were like outside of that, but they were definitely not equipped to handle a bearded dragon. Me and Ian were the best goddamn [ __ ] owners he had. And then when Ian had to move and he couldn't take Puff with him, he was like, "Hey Josh," I'm like, "What's up? You want to take Puff? You all saw the video on Valentine's Day when Ian came over to my old apartment with Puff. And the second I closed the window because it was chilly and I didn't want puffers to get cold, he kind of looked at me like, "This guy is on the up and up. It's harder than Satan's balls in my house and I don't want to turn on the AC because I don't want to like, you know, you're trying to save a couple bucks on the electricity and like I'll push through it. I'd rather be a little bit sweaty like I am right now than being like freezing cold, you know, kind of thing. But that's just my opinion. I'm a little tipsy right now, so don't mind me. But like I just make the best of my circumstances and like you know I'm a little I'm a little tipsy right now. You know I'm not going to lie, man. I'm feeling good when I hit this potion one more time. I'm all geeked out on monster and [ __ ] [ __ ] it. It's like, okay, Cobra's doing his drink combo thing again. Yeah, look at that. Mango and Peach. [ __ ] Twisted Hollywood. Okay, let's There we go. We're going to make some bad Hollywood decisions. Yeah, that's enough because there's a lot of people trying to make it in Hollywood and they just sit there and go, "Oh, hey, look, I see Cobra [ __ ] getting famous because of his combos." uh so I can get famous doing the same thing. And I'm like, if that's all you want to do, go for it. And it's not about becoming the most sexually desired man in Hollywood. It's about spreading your music. So somehow, you know, dude, I'm telling you right now, YouTube, that Captain Captain Black Cherry Pipe Tobacco's got a little bit of bite to it. It smells good and it tastes delicious. I'm like, "Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Doc Holiday from Tombstone is my favorite character.